One Year

| Now Playing: Is That Alright? by Lady Gaga |

I hope you’re still with me

When I’m not quite myself

And I pray that you’ll lift me

When you know I need help

It’s a warm celebration

Of all of our years

I dream of our story

Of our fairytale

Family dinners and family trees

Teaching the kids to say thank you and please

Knowing that if we stay together things will be right

I want you

To look right in my eyes

To tell me you love me

To be by my side

I want you

At the end of my life

Wanna see your face

When I fall from grace

At the moment I die

Is that alright?

_________________________________________________

What better way to start this blog off than letting it turn into a love letter? Right after the last blog, I was all nervous and planning, because I was giving my boyfriend the promise ring that I got to celebrate our one year together. I was nervous because while I knew he would celebrate it and love getting it, there was a little part of me that was a little scared that he wouldn’t like it, but that’s to be expected I suppose when you get something like that. So Monday, since I was off from work and he was off because of the snow, the plan went into motion. I waited until he took a shower, then I started setting everything up. I put the card / letter on the bed and placed the ring, snuggled in it’s box, underneath his pillow on the bed. Then I snuck downstairs and opened the bottle of champagne and waited. And once he came downstairs and I saw the look on his face, what little fear I felt washed away. I’m super glad that he enjoyed it, and he of course went to calling his friends and posting about it, which I just found adorable anyway. The rest of Monday was spent in the hazy happy of that moment, and it was beautiful. He’s truly a gift upon my life. 

Lately, work hasn’t been too bad. Just frustrating more than anything. It’s just two main things about work that have been bothering me. 1. There’s never any equipment, whether they be handheld or otherwise, i.e, carts, in the store. I mean never. Usually you can find something, but not here. Occasionally I’ll find one, and by find one, I mean take someone else’s, but that’s if no one’s around, which is almost never. And 2. There’s just this overwhelming feeling of anxiety when I’m at work. I just always feel like no matter what I do, I’m being watched. And maybe I am or maybe I’m not, but that’s just how it feels. I constantly feel eyes on me, whether they’re there or not, and it’s kind of hard to work like that. I’ve been looking into other potential jobs, I’ve got that phone interview with Nestle on Tuesday. It’s just wearing on me to both not have the things I need to do my job and constantly feeling like someone’s critiquing every step I take.

On my day off, Wednesday, I ended up doing a ton of writing, and chapter eleven is officially done, meaning the halfway point of Book Two has officially been surpassed, and it made me feel so accomplished to have gotten this far. The ultimate goal is to have Book Two ready to go by Halloween, which seems really far away, but I know better. Getting the book done by that date will be a feat, but hopefully it’ll be one I can manage. I got the proof back from my reupload of Book One back on Thursday, and everything looks in order. So it’s ready to be sent the go ahead to Amazon, but I’m slightly hesitant only because I would love to get a literary agent that could help me reach a bigger audience, so I might just hold off on that. Knowing that everything is ready to go at a seconds notice is enough, for the time being. The next step is getting chapter eleven 100% typed up and modified, and plotting our chapter twelve, aptly title “Another Something Bad”.  Titling chapter is one of my absolute favorite things to do in writing, aside from the actual writing itself, so seeing that title written out is just music to my eyes.

Thursday we ended up getting dressed up and going to this 1920’s Speakeasy themed event, but it was a low key bust. Aside from the prohibition propaganda and things of that nature, there really wasn’t that much that screamed “speakeasy”. And standing in a line for an hour just to choose from two “speakeasy” themed cocktails was more than a little annoying. However, we had an awesome dinner just down the street from the event at a place called Savory Grain that I ended up loving. The food was pretty incredible, and the drinks were interesting. Pricey, but interesting nonetheless.

Other than waiting for both of our rings to get here (I ordered mine and an adjusted size for him), not that much is going on in the near future. We might be getting together with Chelsea and Colin next weekend, but we shall see how that pans out. You know what I’d really love? If we somehow got snowed in, but I didn’t have to call out of work, and we could just lounge around and watch movies this weekend. With hot cocoa. And some Smash. Yes. Yes please. Oh, we finished Friends From College, we started this awesome show called Good Girls, and I started and finished the last season of Series Of Unfortunate Events which was AMAZING ugh. I need to reread that series. But I also need to reread Harry Potter. So many books, so little time. 

Until next time,

— Justin