Thursday, February 22, 2018

Neon Ampersand

| Now Playing: Vanity by Cierra Ramirez |

I'm caught in your fingers, yelling out your name.
I'm yelling out vanity,
Can't sleep without you on my mind.
I'm addicted to vanity,
Love stronger than ketamine, or methamphetamine.
Draining my soul right out of my body,
Draining my soul right out of my body,
And I'm yelling out

Your love is like my enemy,
You're gonna be the death of me.
Venom in my veins from your kiss,
Legs numb, too faded to feel shit,
Feeling better than I ought to be.
Crippling waves of sin,
A little gin with the tonic's where I'll probably be.
And when I leave I hope you follow me,
Running out of time I'm slowly draining.

But still I fall asleep at night,
And you're the last thing on my mind.
There ain't a drug this side of town
I can use to ease the night.
I wanna be inside of your mentality,
But the thought of your body is surrounding me.
Got me on my knees, baby please.
I'm, I'm sitting here stuck just yelling out,

Took all the sanity away from my head,
And left me alone.
Can't you see, not even therapy
Could stabilize my head,
Or rebuild my soul.
I'm outta my mind, outta my mind, outta my mind.
Outta my mind, my mind, my mind.
'Cause I'm outta my mind, I'm outta my mind.
I'm out of my mi-i-i-i-i-ind, I'm outta my mind.
I'm outta my mind and I'm yelling out

Sorry not sorry for the mass of lyrics in the NP haha. This song, which has been one of my favorites for a good long while now, came on randomly during my Rose-Colored Boy obsession that was showcased in the last blog, and I like re-fell in love with this song haha. And I've been listening to it a lot the past few days so that's why it's here. Plus, it's just a really good ass song, check it out.

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!! I'm currently writing this on Thursday, and today's my birthday. So long, early twenties, and hello late twenties. And even though I'm only 26, this past year really has taught me so much. I'm very thankful for where my life currently is, even though it's not exactly where I want myself, I'm doing well for myself and I'm just super thankful to all people that are in my life right now, and just really happy.

So let's start with Monday was the only day that I had to work this week. And it wasn't a bad day at all, just one I was trying so hard to push through since I was about to go on vacation haha. As soon as I got off work, I was free! Total freedom from work and obligation for eight days straight, and I was so excited. I didn't really have a whole hell of a lot of plans until the weekend, with Allen and I heading out of town, but that's really is. It ended up working out, and I've ended up being fairly busy during these days off so far haha. I worked out the entire time during Big Brother Monday night and that's really the biggest thing that I did haha. Tuesday was a super exciting day because I was getting another tattoo! Christinia (my tattoo artist) had texted me Monday night confirming my appointment and I sent her the picture so everything would be ready by the time I arrived at 6pm.

I messaged Benzo to see if she wanted to go with me to get my tattoo, so we met up at Blue Lotus, and ugh, I love my tattoo so much. Christinia is literally a master wizard when it comes to tattoos and I literally don't want anywhere or else doing mine. So incredible. Here's some pictures and videos of the adventure to my beautiful hissing ampersand tattoo.

Blue Lotus, the best place
 to get tattooed ever
Halfway through the process
 of this beautiful tattoo
 being created

The finished product.
Hiss hiss, bitches.
My lovely little ampersand the morning after

Ugh, look how beautiful. I just love it so damn much. Huge thanks to Christinia for always bringing my tattoos to life and breathing in this finesse that leaves my awestruck years later. Just as a reference, he's the picture that I gave Christinia to go from.

Ugh, peep that neon ampersand, sis

SEE!? She's literally incredible. So after that, Benzo was trying to get her ampersand tattoo, but Christinia is basically appointment only at this point, so we headed to Star City, where they couldn't do it. And also to Skin Thrillz, who could do it but wanted to charge her 120 for a tattoo smaller than mine and with less detail. That's a no go, sis. So then we just settled into the groove of going to Alejandro's for a little dinner, it was amaze of course. Then we parted ways. I headed to work to grab some Aquaphor because I wasn't sure I had some at the house, and then came home and chilled for most of the night.

Yesterday, I got my ass in gear and go up in time to head to GameStop. I really wanted to trade in my 3DS, my Pokemon Sun game, and my Breath of the Wild game. So I did. And not only was I able to get Bayonetta 2 (and the download for the first Bayonetta) but I also was able to pre-order and fully pay off the new upcoming Kirby game, with some left over on a gift card. So hell yeah haha. Then, I came home and played a bunch of Bayonetta, lounged around. And I finally pieced together what was going to happen in chapter ten of Book Two, so that's good. And then today, I didn't have plans, but last night Allen was like you have to do something it's your birthday, so we're gonna get together and I'm hoping that Benzo can come. All in all, I just wanna get drunk haha. I'm sure the next blog is going to be full of all sort of shenanigans.

Lastly, shoutout to Malcolm! I think that was your name on Blogger. But I opened up Blogger to see a wonderful comment on my last blog, saying he had read my book and was looking for my socials. I have sense added my Twitter and Instagram at the top of the blog for anyone interested. But it was a wonderful little birthday gift to see that comment, so here's to you, Malcolm! Thanks again!

Obsessed with my neon ampersand tattoo,

-- Justin

Sunday, February 18, 2018


| Now Playing: Rose-Colored Boy by Paramore |

Rose-colored boy,
I hear you making all that noise
About the world you want to see.
And oh, I'm so annoyed,
'Cause I just killed off what was left
Of the optimist in me.
Oh, hearts are breaking,
And wars are raging on.
And I have taken,
My glasses off.
You got me nervous,
I'm right at the end of my rope.
A half-empty girl,
Don't make me laugh I'll, choke.

Just let me cry a little bit longer,
I ain't gon smile if I don't want to.
Hey man we all can't be like you,
I wish we were all rose-colored too,
My rose-colored boy.
Low key, no pressure!
Just hang with me and my weather!

When I tell you I've been obsessed with this song over the last week, I've been super fucking obsessed. I know I sort of skipped a Wednesday blog this week, but it was Valentine's Day and I wanted to spend it with my man and just relax. Then Thursday rolled around and it just made more sense for me to wait. But yeah I heard this song Sunday night after the last blog. The video was new on Apple Music and OBSESSED. The video is so good and the song is so upbeat and just exactly what I needed to be honest.

So this week haha. The first two days were pretty uneventful if I'm being quite honest, but Valentine's Day? Ohhhhh honnnnneeeeyyyy. Let's start with work. Work was going great until I was stocking one of my trend pods with bubbles, and the entire thing decided to split open and try to crush me. The side I was stocking did clip me in the shoulder as it fell, but it sort of swung me out of the way from getting trapped underneath it, so it could have been a lot worse. The other endcap on it fell over, and the middle sections popped out, so literally this thing deconstructed right before me very eyes, it was so weird. But we got it put back together, I was fine if not a little sore from it hitting me and everything, but yeah. It was pretty crazy.

After work, I started getting ready since Allen and I had a date for Valentine's Day. Luckily, I got off work at three and I had more time to get ready. So I head up to Blacksburg, pick him up, and we head to the movie theater, but not before we did a quick vodka shot haha. Anyway, we get to the movies and we're a little early so we're just sitting in the car talking and things. So I decided to give him his gift, and I had him the bouquet of alcohol, aka boozequet (literally, I'm such a funny genius) and he loved it of course, rolling his eyes and my HILARIOUS joke haha. We drank one of the Chardonnay minis, since it was that and Bombay Sapphire, but I legit almost threw up because there Sutter House chardonnay is too bitter, way more bitter than Barefoot. It was just too much. So then we got some drinks inside (he got some wine the they legit ripped us off for) and headed in to see the Greatest Showman. But we ended up leaving right before the end because we were going to miss our reservation at Kabuki and we didn't wanna risk it haha.

So we headed over to Kabuki and got sat at the last of two tables they had for the night haha. So I think it was a good thing that we left the movie, even though it was super incredible and super emotional haha. So we talked a lot during the meal, about friends and things, I told him some tea about my past and things of that nature haha. But it was a wonderful night.

We drove back to his apartment, took a long time telling each other goodnight haha, and then I headed back down to Salem. I fully expected him to be asleep, but he messaged me this really cute and sweet message before we went to sleep, about how I'm amazing to him and he doesn't deserve it, which he totally does. It was just really sweet.

Then Benzo and I got together twice this week haha. Once on Friday at Cici's, which included this hilarious bit where these people were parked at the firelane and I was commenting for it. This woman couldn't move the car like she was told, and had to wait on her husband. I was like "You got me out here looking like a fool, Ernest!" to which I said "I'm not listening to this shit tonight, Betty, we got Jebediah in the car." because their grandson was with them haha. Benzo and I about died. Then we got together last night at Longhorn, and it was good but not great. Also, my treadmill got here Wednesday and it's been hard to put together so I'm putting it off. My vacation starts after I get off work Monday and I'm so ready. God a tattoo appointment Tuesday and a bitch is ready.

Liquored up in life from the boozquet,

-- Justin

Sunday, February 11, 2018

Mr. Peacock In The Hall With The Lead Pipe

Yet another blog without a NP. I haven't really been listening to just one song really. I've been listening to more of The Middle by Maren Morris and way too many others and a few other songs here and there like Jeepers Creepers by The Mosers, which I have loved for so long now, but ultimately, there just isn't a song that's highlighted the past few days haha.

Work has been a legit struggle this past week. Both Thursday and Friday, I had to endure it all without my lovely little Faith Rose, and it was tough. It's funny how just her not being there made the days drag on and on. But she was legitimately sick, so I can't fault her for it. Plus, Friday I think she had to go back to the hospital for dehydration, but she's all better now. I've already talked to her today and she confirmed that she's no longer contagious and that's she going to be at work tomorrow. Literally thank God.

I started implementing Plan B to my little Valentine's Day gift for Allen, because super glue was just not having it, so I went with my cute ass pink duct tape instead, and it's proving to be the better option of the two. Super thankful for it too because I was getting more than a little frustrated by the super glue. Anyway, as I've mentioned I've been looking forward to this Clue themed get together all week long, because it's just super fun and I loved Clue and honestly it's an excuse to dress up and have fun so what's not to enjoy? All my pieces for my outfit came in literally each day of the rest of the week starting with Friday, and everything was perfect and ready to be put together. I tried on everything, and it was perfect. I was worried that I was serving a little too much Oktoberfest in my outfit, but all was well.

Saturday comes around, and I was super excited. Allen had texted me about going for that beer tasting before the Clue Night and then we could get ready together. And since we didn't get to go to the tasting on Tuesday when I surprised him, I was all for it. So mid-day Saturday, I headed up there and we went to the tasting. It was really rainy, but it didn't matter. Clue was just seeping into life since it rains in the movie haha. So we get to the tasting and there's all these people just sitting around at tables and playing games while drinking and it's a fun time. We order some flights and head to the table that just so happened to have the literal airplane turbine of heaters sitting next to it. Literally, I was turning red from the heat, it was crazy. But it wasn't too bad. Allen and I just talked and drank our samples of beer. Surprisingly, I liked the darkest one, because it had like a lingering coffee taste? I don't know, but it was pretty good. All in all it was a really fun experience, but beer is just maybe not for me haha.

Our ten samples of beer ft. Allen

I was feeling some type of way after we left the tasting. Not necessarily drunk but like full? Which apparently is normal when you drink beer, which obviously I wouldn't know. But anyway, we headed back to Allen's apartment and got dressed for Clue Night. He was obviously a male version of Ms. Scarlet because obviously, and I have to say we look pretty damn good. Here's some pictures of our outfits.

Mr. Scarlet

Mr. Peacock

I love how extra we are haha. So anyway, after we did our little photo shoot, West came home and we kept drinking and trying out the cocktails Allen had made for three of the characters. There was a little drama with Amanda and CJ but they ended up not coming to Clue Night, but Allen's co-worker Thora and her boyfriend Marcus did end up coming, and they were a hoot and a holler. After everyone got there and everyone was drinking and getting to know each other and having a good time, we started watching the movie. I've only seen Clue once, and that was several years ago haha, so I had forgotten the ending other than it was multiple. So we had a great time watching that and making commentary about our characters. Oh, I forgot. Thora was a female version of Mr. Green and Marcus was Colonel Mustard.

After the movie, we played two rounds of the game. I won the first round! It was Mrs. White (West) in the kitchen with the rope, and I was such a damn good detective haha. But I was getting a little too drunk by the second round, and Thora ended up winning by default because everyone else guessed wrong haha. You guessed it, the second round was the title of the blog, but obviously I tweaked the gender for my portrayal haha. So after that, Thora and Marcus headed home and the three of us just hung out for a little while. We talked about some of Allen and West's college time, including streaking stories that are just too much haha, and then we debated the LGBTQ alphabet soup and the confusion off all the labels and everything. It was a nice discussion, and after that everyone headed to bed. Let's just say it was a wonderful time before bed, and Allen and I were having a great time and had wonderful conversation afterwards. We talked about getting together for Valentine's Day, maybe seeing Call Me By Your Name and catching dinner, and I spilled that I got him something, and he reacted similarly to when I told him about the Christmas gift haha. He said he's gonna get me something but he really doesn't have to. I've found that giving is a lot more fun than receiving lately, in more ways than one.

Then we got up this morning, we both slept wonderfully. Shout out to my little table fan that I brought with me for keeping me cool throughout the night haha. We talked more about getting together for Valentine's Day and everything, and then I headed home, grabbed some Taco Bell for my "I drank a lot yesterday meal", and I sat down and wrote! I FINALLY finished chapter nine, and I'm so excited to be almost at the lovely destination of halfway done with Book Two! I'm so damn happy with how this sequel is squaring up and I can't wait to see where it continues to go.

This is my last full week of work before vacation comes though, and I'm ready for it. I've finally heard back from my mom, by the way. I messaged her on Friday I think and said I don't know if you're mad at me or if you're super busy but I love you and all that. She replied with yeah things have been ridiculously hectic and she's tried calling but it says unavailable. Which I don't know, she's never had a problem before, so it makes me wonder how valid that is. But you know, progress.

Also, the treadmill I ordered is supposed to be here on Wednesday, Valentine's Day. I can't wait to take it for a spin.

Peacocking from all the fun,

-- Justin

Wednesday, February 7, 2018

Super Cute™

| Now Playing: The Middle by Maren Morris, Zedd, & Grey |

So pull me closer,
Why don't you pull me close
Why don't you come on over
I can't just let you go.

Oh baby,
Why don't you just meet me in the middle?
I'm losing' my mind just a little.
So why do you just meet me in the middle,
In the middle.
Why don't you just meet me in the middle?
I'm losin' my mind just a little.
So why don't you just meet me in the middle,
In the middle.

WHEW. What a few days it's been haha. So Monday was a pretty cool day. Faith Rose was starting to feel sick, but hey, at least she had this hilarious knew laugh because her throat hurt and it was fucking me up haha. Nothing too crazy happened at work, so I was and am always super thankful for that. But what happened when I got off work was super interesting haha. So Allen messaged me and said he wanted to run something by me, and the proceeded to ask me if I would be into a Clue themed get together at this house this weekend, where we dress up as our favorite characters and watch the movie and play the game and, of course, I said I was so into that that it was criminal. See what I did there? Anyway, as soon as I found that out, I started to plan out what my outfit as the male version of Mrs. Peacock, because she's obvi my fave. He also sent me this adorable video of him from when he was a freshman in college and two of his friends made a video of themselves singing along and acting to Disney songs. It was pretty damn adorable. And his acting was phenom, Meryl surely approved haha. I can't remember if I mentioned the whole Meryl inside joke that we have now, but basically it's my acting mode is just called Meryl now. I also went ahead and started gathering things for what I plan on giving Allen for Valentine's Day because I'm adorable. And I can't wait for him to see it, even though I think I'm going to have to switch things up a little bit because today, I started trying to get everything to come together and the plan just was'n't having it haha. He also did something really super cute Monday morning by putting me on his Instagram for Man Crush Monday saying thanks for leaving your jacket so I can wear it and always be warm. God, he's so damn cute.

I was off on Tuesday, got paid, and was planning a surprise. It was quite the busy day for me. So because I was off, and I'm practically never off in the middle of the week, I decided that I wanted to surprise Allen and show up at his work to take him to lunch. But I had to keep up appearances so it could remain a secret. So I set an alarm to wake up around the time we would normally be saying good morning to each other and saying we were at work and what not, so I did that. Then I went back to sleep and woke up to my second alarm that I set so I could start getting ready to go up there and surprise him. I know, I'm super cute. Feel free to take a moment to aww to yourself. So I drive up there, and since I'm super early / don't really know when he was going to take his lunch, I texted him that I had a surprise for him and to just let me know when he went to break. I baited my time by shopping around Goodwill there in Christiansburg for the pieces for my now all finished Mr. Peacock outfit haha. But they ended up not having anything for me, so I waited some more. He texted me and asked what was going on and I spilled the beans haha. He immediately called me and was like "well hello" in the super cute way that he does. And he said he had already left but to meet him at his apartment and we'd eat something there.

I was just about to pull into his place and he calls again, saying he really doesn't have food there, even just for him, and said we could eat at the marketplace that's literally right by his apartment that we pass all the time when we go anywhere in his car, and so I said we could do that. We get there, he's telling me about his day and the drama going on at his workplace, we get some grilled chicken sandwiches that were pretty good but ya know, a sandwich is a sandwich. But it was super great and super cute to surprise him, and see the smile on his face that I did it. Shortly after we ate, he had to get back to work though, so he thanked me for surprising him, and he headed back to work. He was gonna see if I wanted to go to a tasting with him, but when he looked up the places while we waited for our food, they were all closed, so we opted to just see each other this weekend. And since the tasting wasn't happening, I decided to hit up Benzo and see if she wanted to get together. While I was waited for her to get ready, I went shopping for more possible Mr. Peacock attire.

I stopped by work and got my hair dye because I really needed it, learned that Michael Preston is moving departments and we're going to be managerless until further notice in a week or so, and then I hit Goodwill across the street. They ended up having a navy suit jacket that fit me, but this was a little too big, so I decided against it. It was at this point I realized that I was not going to find a navy suit jacket in my size in time, so I altered my outfit idea. I'm going for navy pants, white button up, suspenders, and glasses haha. I ended up buying this ADORABLE peacock bow tie (because the tie that I wanted wasn't available for two-day shipping and thus wouldn't get here by Saturday) that I'm really excited about. I also ordered teal suspenders because they're so hard to come by. Anyway, after hitting up Goodwill, I decided to try our Burlington, and that's when things started to come together. I found a white button up for cheap AND a pair of navy pants (on clearance no less) that fit me perfectly. Actually, I haven't tried the shirt. Let me do that right quick. Update, it fits beautifully! Anyway, I also so this navy hat that would look cute if I put like some peacock feathers in it, but I decided against it because I didn't think I had the money to order peacock feathers in time. So I took my shirt and my pants and got gas near Alejandro's and waited for Benzo.

We caught up, had a barrel of laughs like we always do. The food was great, like always, and we went to Ross after, like always haha. I didn't find anything there, even after trying on all things anchor but not of them fit, but Benzo found this cute navy and striped floral shirt that looked super cute on her. After that we got a little nibble of ice cream from Bruster's and we bid each other adieu. Then I dyed my hair as soon as I got home because I super needed it, and it looks so much better. I don't know what it is about me and wanting my hair black lately, but I'm into it by Ariana Grande. OH! Something else I learned while eating at Alejandro's was that my tax money updated and said it would be here the next day! So imagine how excited I was to get a text at six o'clock this morning saying I had already gotten my tax money!? SUPER EXCITED.

Work was pretty bland, Faith Rose wasn't there. Apparently she called out Tuesday and she wasn't there today. Confirmed she has the flu and I missed not having my buddy there today. But work wasn't really too bad, just the same old, trying to get everything straightened up and everything. Oh, and Monday I stayed after a little bit to help Faith Rose with some of her stuff in Bakery, so I had a little bit of overtime to kill, so I got to leave a little early. Which enabled me to run back over to Burlington and hoped they still had my navy hat, since I bought and two day shipped some peacock feathers from Amazon haha, and luckily it was still there. I had a hoot and a holler with the check out girl, she thought the hat was super stylin and kept complimenting me on my choice haha. Then when I told her what it was for she was living. She seemed like the kind of person you want to be friends with, and in retail, that speaks volumes. She's one of the good ones.

Then tonight was the premiere of Celebrity Big Brother. Allen and I livetexted through it and it was a shit show but we'll see how it goes. I also bought Season Six of Drag Race and watched some of that while I tried to do some wrapping on Allen's Valentine's gift, but it wasn't happening. So I gotta go with Plan B. AND we talked about the show we're going to back at Allen's college the weekend of my birthday and he said he got the tickets. So I went ahead and asked him what questions I needed so I could book the room. Then it said only 1 adult and I had to change the room but it wouldn't let me. So I had to cancel it and then rebook it with two adults. Legit Diane (my suburban white mom) came out. And since Allen's suburban white mom (Helen) was out today since he had a less than great dat at work, both of us were ready to claw a bitch.

And that's about it! This was really a recap blog, sorry not sorry. Also, I'm writing this blog with the new wireless keyboard I got from work today! I'm so much better and less hard on my hands than the Apple one that came with my computer. Gotta keep these wrists as dainty as I can.

Enthralled by all the super cuteness,

-- Justin